My Mister

What kind of drama it is

It is the story of an office worker in his forties and a woman in her twenties, each crushed by their own lives, who come to recognise each other and gradually find the strength to hold on. Instead of big incidents, the centre of gravity is ordinary scenes: the commute, the neighbourhood after work, drinks with old friends. It is sometimes billed as a romance, but it is really closer to a drama about how people respect one another. If you are new to it, set aside genre expectations for a while and simply follow the characters through their days.

The makers and the cast

The writer is Park Hae-young, who wrote Another Miss Oh and later My Liberation Notes, and who is known for dialogue that lingers on how ordinary people talk and what they keep to themselves. Director Kim Won-seok, of Misaeng and Signal, frames familiar spaces such as the office and the neighbourhood with a calm eye. The leads are Lee Sun-kyun and Lee Ji-eun (IU), and the ensemble playing the hero's brothers and neighbours is just as central to the show. One of its distinctive traits is that the whole neighbourhood feels like a character in its own right, more than any one or two leads.

• Aired: tvN, 2018, 16 episodes
• Writer: Park Hae-young (Another Miss Oh, My Liberation Notes)
• Director: Kim Won-seok (Misaeng, Signal)
• Cast: Lee Sun-kyun, Lee Ji-eun (IU)

What the slow pace builds

Not much happens in the first few episodes, and they can feel slow. The show is built so that emotions move only after you understand what kind of day each character is getting through. Because those early silences and repeated routines pile up, a single small remark later on can hit very hard. It is worth holding off judgement for the first three episodes or so. Once you are past them, it becomes clear why some people return to this drama again and again.

Listening to sound and space

This is a drama that uses sound a great deal. Subway noise, footsteps in an alley and everyday sounds carried over a phone speak for the characters' feelings. Watching with earphones or somewhere quiet makes the gaps between lines far easier to hear. The contrast between the neighbourhood and the office is worth noticing too; how differently the same person looks in each place shapes the texture of the story. Many scenes have little background music, so the moment music does come in can itself be an emotional cue.

Things to watch for

It is a show that reveals more on a second viewing than on the first. Keeping the points below in mind the first time through makes the relationships feel fuller.

• Who speaks formally to whom, and when they drop it
• Small kindnesses passed around at meals and drinks
• The gruff way the brothers treat one another
• How faces change between the office and the neighbourhood

Knowing Korean workplace culture helps

Korean office ranks and titles, after-work dinners and senior-junior relationships run all through the story. If you know that people are addressed by their job title plus an honorific, and that speech shifts up or down depending on age and relationship, you will read far more tension into the same lines. Comparing what is similar to and different from workplace culture where you live is another way to enjoy it. Watch for switches between polite and casual speech, which subtitles cannot always carry.

Worth knowing before you start

The show deals with heavy material such as debt, violence, illness in the family and caregiving, and some scenes depict physical violence directly. If you are going through a hard time, it can shake you emotionally, so keep an eye on how you are feeling. It also helps to know that the age gap between the leads and the nature of their relationship drew a range of opinions around the time it aired; you can then judge for yourself the distance at which the show portrays that relationship. When hard scenes pile up, it is fine to pause and take a break.

Who it suits

It suits viewers looking for a drama that stays with them through dialogue and atmosphere rather than shocks, and adults worn out by work and relationships who could use some comfort. If you liked the same writer's My Liberation Notes or the same director's Misaeng, its texture will feel familiar. Rather than bingeing, watching one or two episodes a day and letting each one settle suits this drama well.